Terry Pratchett's Hogfather (2006): Difference between revisions

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Line 21: Line 21:
[[Mr Sideney]] - [[Nigel Planer]]
[[Mr Sideney]] - [[Nigel Planer]]


[[Medium Dave]] - [[Peter Guiness]]
[[Medium Dave]] - [[Peter Guinness]]


[[Banjo (Hogfather)|Banjo]] - [[Stephen Marcus]]
[[Banjo (Hogfather)|Banjo]] - [[Stephen Marcus]]
Line 59: Line 59:
[[Mrs Gaiter]] - [[Deborah Winckles]]
[[Mrs Gaiter]] - [[Deborah Winckles]]


[[Twyla]] - [[Madeleine Rackic-Platt|Madeleine Rackic Platt]]
[[Twyla]] - [[Madeleine Rakic-Platt|Madeleine Rackic Platt]]


[[Gawain]] - [[Hugo Altman]]
[[Gawain]] - [[Hugo Altman]]
Line 81: Line 81:
[[Hogfather]] - [[Shend]]
[[Hogfather]] - [[Shend]]


[[Young Albert]] - [[Fox Jackson-Keen]]
Young [[Albert (Hogfather)|Albert]] - [[Fox Jackson-Keen]]


[[Slimazel the Bogeyman]] - [[Don Wetherhead]]
[[Slimazel the Bogeyman]] - [[Don Wetherhead]]
Line 109: Line 109:
[[Small Boy's Sister]] - [[Lydia Altman]]
[[Small Boy's Sister]] - [[Lydia Altman]]


[[Death of Rats]] - [[Dorckey Hellmice]]
[[Death of Rats]] - Dorckey Hellmice


[[The Toymaker]] - [[Terry Pratchett]]
[[The Toymaker]] - [[Terry Pratchett]]
Line 125: Line 125:
== Character thumbnails with links to profiles ==
== Character thumbnails with links to profiles ==
<gallery>
<gallery>
File:Moist_Von_Lipwig_-_Edited.png|[[Moist Von Lipwig]]
File:Albert_Hogfather_-_Edited.png|[[Albert (Hogfather)|Albert]]
File:Reacher_Gilt_-_Edited.png|[[Reacher Gilt]]
File:Teatime_-_Edited.png|[[Teatime]]
File:Adora_Belle_Dearheart_-_Edited.png|[[Adora Belle Dearheart]]
File:Susan_Hogfather_-_Edited.png|[[Susan (Hogfather)|Susan]]
File:Groat_-_Edited.png|[[Groat]]
File:Lord_Downey_-_Edited.png|[[Lord Downey]]
File:Lord_Vetinari_-_Edited.png|[[Lord Vetinari]]
File:Vernon_Crumley_-_Edited.png|[[Vernon Crumley]]
File:Ridcully_-_Edited.png|[[Ridcully]]
File:Mr_Sideney_-_Edited.png|[[Mr Sideney]]
File:Drumknott_-_Edited.png|[[Drumknott]]
File:Medium_Dave_-_Edited.png|[[Medium Dave]]
File:Dave_Pins_-_Edited.png|[[Dave Pins]]
File:Banjo_Hogfather_-_Edited.png|[[Banjo (Hogfather)|Banjo]]
File:Mr_Pony_-_Edited.png|[[Mr Pony]]
File:Chickenwire_-_Edited.png|[[Chickenwire]]
File:Priest_Going_Postal_-_Edited.png|[[Priest (Going Postal)|Priest]]
File:Bilious_-_Edited.png|[[Bilious]]
File:Miss_Cripslock_-_Edited.png|[[Miss Cripslock]]
File:Violet_-_Edited.png|[[Violet]]
File:Horsefry_-_Edited.png|[[Horsefry]]
File:Death_-_Edited.png|[[Death]]
File:Mr_Spools_-_Edited.png|[[Mr Spools]]
File:Raven_-_Edited.png|[[Raven]]
File:Stanley_Going_Postal_-_Edited.png|[[Stanley (Going Postal)|Stanley]]
File:Corporal_Nobbs_-_Edited.png|[[Corporal Nobbs]]
File:Mr_Pump_-_Edited.png|[[Mr Pump]]
File:Constable_Visit_-_Edited.png|[[Constable Visit]]
File:Gryle_-_Edited.png|[[Gryle]]
File:Ponder_Stibbons_-_Edited.png|[[Ponder Stibbons]]
File:Trooper_-_Edited.png|[[Trooper]]
File:Mr_Brown_-_Edited.png|[[Mr Brown]]
File:Sergeant_Angua_-_Edited.png|[[Sergeant Angua]]
File:The_Dean_-_Edited.png|[[The Dean]]
File:Mad_Al_-_Edited.png|[[Mad Al]]
File:The_Bursar_-_Edited.png|[[The Bursar]]
File:Sane_Alex_-_Edited.png|[[Sane Alex]]
File:Lecturer_in_Recent_Runes_-_Edited.png|[[Lecturer in Recent Runes]]
File:Princess_Going_Postal_-_Edited.png|[[Princess (Going Postal)|Princess]]
File:Chair_of_Indefinite_Studies_-_Edited.png|[[Chair of Indefinite Studies]]
File:Roger_Going_Postal_-_Edited.png|[[Roger (Going Postal)|Roger]]
File:Ernie_Hogfather_-_Edited.png|[[Ernie (Hogfather)|Ernie]]
File:Old_Lady_-_Edited.png|[[Old Lady]]
File:Mr_Gaiter_-_Edited.png|[[Mr Gaiter]]
File:Postman_-_Edited.png|[[Postman]]
File:Mrs_Gaiter_-_Edited.png|[[Mrs Gaiter]]
File:John_Dearheart_-_Edited.png|[[John Dearheart]]
File:Twyla_-_Edited.png|[[Twyla]]
File:Sapphire_-_Edited.png|[[Sapphire]]
File:Gawain_-_Edited.png|[[Gawain]]
File:Undertaker_-_Edited.png|[[Undertaker]]
File:Tooth_Fairy_-_Edited.png|[[Tooth Fairy/Bogey Man]]
File:Shop_Girl_-_Edited.png|[[Shop Girl]]
File:Pixie_Helper_-_Edited.png|[[Pixie Helper]]
File:Parker_Going_Postal_-_Edited.png|[[Parker (Going Postal)|Parker]]
File:Modo_-_Edited.png|[[Modo]]
File:Receptionist_Going_Postal_-_Edited.png|[[Receptionist (Going Postal)|Receptionist]]
File:Student_Wizard_-_Edited.png|[[Student Wizard]]
File:Hobson_-_Edited.png|[[Hobson]]
File:Bobble_Hat_Child_-_Edited.png|[[Bobble Hat Child]]
File:Cashier_-_Edited.png|[[Cashier]]
File:Bobble_Hat_Child's_Mother_-_Edited.png|[[Bobble Hat Child's Mother]]
File:Maitre_d'_-_Edited.png|[[Maitre d']]
File:Grotto_Hogfather_-_Edited.png|[[Grotto Hogfather]]
File:Aggy_-_Edited.png|[[Aggy]]
File:Party_Guest_1_-_Edited.png|[[Guest 1]]
File:Farmer_-_Edited.png|[[Farmer]]
File:Hogfather_-_Edited.png|[[Hogfather]]
File:Bank_Clerk_-_Edited.png|[[Bank Clerk]]
File:Slimazel_the_Bogeyman_-_Edited.png|[[Slimazel the Bogeyman]]
File:Otto_Chriek_-_Edited.png|[[Otto Chriek]]
File:Carter_Hogfather_-_Edited.png|[[Carter (Hogfather)|Carter]]
File:Great_A'Tuin_-_Edited.png|[[Great A'Tuin]]
File:Toothguard_1_-_Edited.png|[[Toothguard 1]]
File:Boris_Going_Postal_-_Edited.png|[[Boris (Going Postal)|Boris]]
File:Toothguard_7_-_Edited.png|[[Toothguard 7]]
File:Auditor_-_Edited.png|[[Auditors]]
File:Verruca_Gnome_-_Edited.png|[[Verruca Gnome]]
File:Hair_Loss_Fairy_-_Edited.png|[[Hair Loss Fairy]]
File:Ma_Lillywhite_-_Edited.png|[[Ma Lillywhite]]
File:Small_Boy_-_Edited.png|[[Small Boy]]
File:Small_Boy's_Sister_-_Edited.png|[[Small Boy's Sister]]
File:Death_of_Rats_-_Edited.png|[[Death of Rats]]
File:The_Toymaker_-_Edited.png|[[The Toymaker]]
File:Mustrum_Ridcully_-_Edited.png|[[Ridcully|Mustrum Ridcully]]
File:Great_A'Tuin_Hogfather_-_Edited.png|[[Great A'Tuin]]
File:Eater_of_Socks_-_Edited.png|[[Eater of Socks]]
File:Hex_-_Edited.png|[[Hex]]
File:Binky_-_Edited.png|[[Binky]]
</gallery>
</gallery>


== Detailed Synopsis ==
== Detailed Synopsis ==


"Everything starts somewhere, although many physicists disagree.  There is the constant desire to find out where.  Where is the point where it all began?  But much, much later than that, the Discworld was formed.  Drifting onwards through space atop four elephants on the shell of a giant turtle, the great Great A'Tuin|A'Tuin.  It was some time after its creation when most people forgot that the very oldest stories of the beginning are, sooner or later, about blood.  At least, that's one theory.  The philosopher Didactylos has suggested an alternative hypothesis.  Things just happen, what the hell?  And so our story begins in Ankh-Morpork, the twin city of proud Ankh and pestilent Morpork, the biggest city in Discworld, a city where magic is just another job, and where the Tower of Art of the Unseen University for Wizards looms over all the dark, narrow streets.  Our story begins on a midwinter festival bearing a remarkable similarity to your Christmas.  And so, it was the night before Hogswatch."   
"Everything starts somewhere, although many physicists disagree.  There is the constant desire to find out where.  Where is the point where it all began?  But much, much later than that, the Discworld was formed.  Drifting onwards through space atop four elephants on the shell of a giant turtle, the great [[Great A'Tuin|A'Tuin]].  It was some time after its creation when most people forgot that the very oldest stories of the beginning are, sooner or later, about blood.  At least, that's one theory.  The philosopher Didactylos has suggested an alternative hypothesis.  Things just happen, what the hell?  And so our story begins in Ankh-Morpork, the twin city of proud Ankh and pestilent Morpork, the biggest city in Discworld, a city where magic is just another job, and where the Tower of Art of the Unseen University for Wizards looms over all the dark, narrow streets.  Our story begins on a midwinter festival bearing a remarkable similarity to your Christmas.  And so, it was the night before Hogswatch."   


Susan (Hogfather)|Susan tells Twyla and Gawain a bedtime story about Jack and the Beanstock, but in the perspective that Jack is the bad guy.  Twyla asks Susan if the Hogfather is coming and Gawain asks when he will arrive.  Susan tells them if they don't believe in the Hogfather, then he won't come.  At the Guild of Assassins, Lord Downey gets a visit from one of the Auditors.  He offers him three million dollars in order for the Assassins Guild to destroy the Hogfather.  Meanwhile, the Hogfather is making his rounds delivering toys.  Susan gets a knock on her window, but tells whoever it is to go away and shortly after, Twyla walks in and tells her she is afraid of the monster in the cellar.  Guest 1 sees Susan carrying a fire poker and tells Mrs Gaiter, Mr Gaiter and the part guests.  Mrs Gaiter asks Susan what she is doing, and Susan explains she is going to use it to kill the monster.  Carter brings in tea for Lord Downey and goes to fetch another cup for Teatime, who has suddenly appeared in the room.  Lord Downey goes over Teatime's assassination of Sir George and shows him a drawing of the Hogfather.  The Gaiters and party guests listen as Susan gets rids of the monster and as she leaves the cellar, Mr Gaiter claps for her and congratulates her.  After the guests leave, Susan drags a bag with the monster outside and kicks outside.  Teatime tells Lord Downey the task will be difficult, but he has already thought about how to kill the Hogfather and Death and takes the job.  Death notices something is amiss and takes his sword and scythe.  Teatime has a meeting with Medium Dave, Banjo, Chickenwire and Mr Sideney.  Twyla tells Susan there is a monster under her bed and finds Slimazel the Bogeyman hiding under Twyla's bed.  Susan warns Slimazel to go away and he flees.  Mr Brown shows up at the meeting and Teatime punches Banjo in the mouth, knocking out one of his teeth.  As Violet collects Banjo's tooth she is grabbed, while Teatime hijacks Ernie (Hogfather)|Ernie's carriage.  Banjo carries Violet and puts her in Ernie's carriage and the others get inside.  Banjo reminds Medium Dave that their mom told them not to hit girls.  Teatime then tells Ernie to drive to the Unseen University.  Ponder Stibbons tells The Bursar that they no longer have a radiation shield as Hex advised it was needed.  Ponder then shows The Bursar a thaumic particle accelerator the students built.  The Bursar runs to The Dean and asks him if he has seen the Head of Inadvisably Applied Magic.  The Chair of Indefinite Studies suggests he ask the Lecturer in Recent Runes and an explosion erupts.  Mustrum [[Ridcully]] walks into the room and says in his day as a student he wouldn't be studying the night before Hogswatch.  He tells tells The Bursar and the others that he is going to reopen former Archchancellor Weatherwax's old bathroom. Ernie drives the carriage to a wall behind the Unseen University and Teatime takes some magic powder that Ernie has and throws it at the wall and a portal forms.  Teatime then kills Ernie and drives the carriage through the portal.  The Auditors appear and one of them figures out that Teatime is going after the [[Tooth Fairy/Bogey Man]] in order to control the minds of children.  Death comes to collect Ernie
[[Susan (Hogfather)|Susan]] tells [[Twyla]] and [[Gawain]] a bedtime story about Jack and the Beanstock, but in the perspective that Jack is the bad guy.  Twyla asks Susan if the [[Hogfather]] is coming and Gawain asks when he will arrive.  Susan tells them if they don't believe in the Hogfather, then he won't come.  At the Guild of Assassins, [[Lord Downey]] gets a visit from one of the [[Auditors]].  He offers Lord Downey three million dollars in order for the Guild to destroy the Hogfather.  Meanwhile, the Hogfather is making his rounds delivering toys.  Susan gets a knock on her window, but tells whoever it is to go away and shortly after, Twyla walks in and tells her she is afraid of the monster in the cellar.  [[Guest 1]] sees Susan carrying a fire poker and tells [[Mrs Gaiter]], [[Mr Gaiter]] and the party guests.  Mrs Gaiter asks Susan what she is doing, and Susan explains she is going to use it to kill the monster.  [[Carter (Hogfather)|Carter]] brings in tea for Lord Downey and goes to fetch another cup for [[Teatime]], who has suddenly appeared in the room.  Lord Downey goes over Teatime's assassination of Sir George and shows him a drawing of the Hogfather.  The Gaiters and party guests listen as Susan gets rid of the monster and as she leaves the cellar, Mr Gaiter claps for her and congratulates her.  After the guests leave, Susan drags a bag with the monster and kicks it outside.  Teatime tells Lord Downey the task of killing the Hogfather will be difficult, but he has already thought about how to kill the Hogfather and [[Death]] and takes the job.   
 
Death notices something is amiss and takes his sword and scythe.  Teatime has a meeting with [[Medium Dave]], [[Banjo (Hogfather)|Banjo]], [[Chickenwire]] and [[Mr Sideney]].  Twyla tells Susan there is a monster under her bed and Susan finds [[Slimazel the Bogeyman]] hiding under Twyla's bed.  Susan warns Slimazel to go away and he flees.  [[Mr Brown]] shows up at the meeting and Teatime punches Banjo in the mouth, knocking out one of his teeth.  As [[Violet]] collects Banjo's tooth she is grabbed, while Teatime hijacks [[Ernie (Hogfather)|Ernie]]'s carriage.  Banjo carries Violet and puts her in Ernie's carriage and the others get inside.  Banjo reminds Medium Dave that their mom told them not to hit girls.  Teatime then tells Ernie to drive to the Unseen University.  [[Ponder Stibbons]] tells [[The Bursar]] that they no longer have a radiation shield as [[Hex]] advised it was needed.  Ponder then shows The Bursar a thaumic particle accelerator the students built.  The Bursar runs to [[The Dean]] and asks him if he has seen the Head of Inadvisably Applied Magic.  The [[Chair of Indefinite Studies]] suggests he ask the [[Lecturer in Recent Runes]] and an explosion erupts.  Mustrum [[Ridcully]] walks into the room and says in his day as a student he wouldn't be studying the night before Hogswatch.  He tells tells The Bursar and the others that he is going to reopen former Archchancellor Weatherwax's old bathroom.
 
Ernie drives the carriage to a wall behind the Unseen University and Teatime takes some magic powder that Ernie has and throws it at the wall and a portal forms.  Teatime then kills Ernie and drives the carriage through the portal.  The Auditors appear and one of them figures out that Teatime is going after the [[Tooth Fairy/Bogey Man|Tooth Fairy]] in order to control the minds of children.  Death comes to collect Ernie and then asks him about Teatime.  Teatime and the others walk into the Tooth Fairy's castle and some Toothguards stick their heads out from behind pillars and look at them.  The Toothguards are then killed by Medium Dave and Chickenwire.  [[Toothguard 1]] is talking to another Toothguard when they are killed by Banjo.  Another Toothguard is killed by Teatime.  [[Albert (Hogfather)|Albert]] is told by Death that something isn't right.  The [[Raven]] agrees with Death and the mythological person's room opens up and Death notices the Hogfather's sand grains are running out.  [[Modo]] gets the machine ready for Ridcully to take a shower, and The Bursar and others warn Ridcully against using the shower, but Ridcully gets into the shower.  Teatime tells Chickenwire and Medium Dave to pile all the teeth into a pile and tells Mr Brown to unlock every door in the castle. 
 
Death rides [[Binky]] to the Hogfather's Castle of Bones.  He finds the Hogfather's robes but no Hogfather.  [[Pixie Helper]] runs down the castle stairs and is visibly drunk and celebrates that he has Hogswatch off, but realizes he will have a bad hangover in the morning.  The Pixie Helper sees Death and then runs away.  Twyla and Gawain start to question if the Hogfather is real to Susan.  A rat is killed in a rat trap and [[Death of Rats]] comes to collect its soul.  Death disguised as the Hogfather comes down the chimney and leaves presents for a girl named Virginia.  Ridcully turns a tap called Old Faithful and then quickly exits the shower due to the extreme water pressure.  Susan catches Raven in the house and she kicks him out after he warns her, but doesn't tell her what the warning is.  Teatime asks Mr Sideney if he has any friends and then tells him, he doesn't have many friends, but also doesn't have any enemies.  Susan catches Death dressed as the Hogfather and he tells her the Hogfather is gone.  Susan demands to know what is going on, but Death refuses to tell her.  Mr Brown opens a door and Teatime finds a Toothguard hiding and scares him to death.  Susan stops time and leaves the house and finds Binky outside and rides him. 
 
Ridcully tells The Dean a story his father told him about the [[Verruca Gnome]].  Susan goes to Death's house and the Raven welcomes her home.  Albert suggests that they do a public appearance in order to increase children's belief in the Hogfather.  At Crumley's department store, an explosion occurs and [[Small Boy]] and [[Small Boy's Sister]] comment on the Hogfather's hogs and how one of them is peeing.  [[Grotto Hogfather]] walks out of the Hogfather display and tells [[Vernon Crumley]] he quits.  Crumley confronts Death and demands to know what is going on.  While Ridcully is trimming his toe nails, he catches the Verruca Gnome sneaking up on him.  Death asks [[Bobble Hat Child]] what she wants for Hogswatch and when [[Bobble Hat Child's Mother]] starts to speak for her, Death snaps her fingers, causing Bobble Hat Child's Mother to stop talking.  Bobble Hat Child asks for an army and castle and a sword. The Verruca Gnome tells Ridcully he doesn't know why he is the Verruca gnome, he just suddenly came to be and Ridcully shows him the special nail clipping disposal in the bathroom and tells him that if you have a part of someone, you can control them. 
 
Medium Dave and Chickenwire finish gathering all of the teeth and Mr Sideney starts to cast his spell.  Bobble Hat Child's Mother tells Death she can't afford everything he just gave Bobble Hat Child and Death tells her they are free, which upsets Crumley.  Ridcully talks with Stibbons who shows him Hex.  Ridcully then shows him and The Bursar the Verruca Gnome and wonders why there isn't a god of hangovers.  Raven tells Susan that the Hogfather didn't always hand out presents and he was once a demiurge that people sacrificed to in order for the sun to rise.  He then had to change when people realizes the sun rose anyways.  [[Corporal Nobbs]] and [[Constable Visit]] go to Crumley's and Crumley demands they arrest Death.  Nobbs waits in line and tells Death he was a good individual.  As teeth start to fly out of the teeth pile, Mr Sideney tells Teatime there are random bits of belief affecting the spell.  Nobbs shows Visit his Burleigh & Stronghearm double-action triple-cantilever crossbow with a polished-walnut stock and silver engraved facings he got from Death and Visit disapproves.  Susan figures out that for the sun to come up tomorrow, the Hogfather has to be alive.  The magic on the tooth works and the Hogfather's castle starts to crumble.  As Medium Dave and Chickenwire are planning to leave with property deeds they found, Teatime stops them and tells Medium Dave, he controls Banjo now. 
 
Susan takes Death's sword and Binky and goes to the Hogfather's castle.  Twyla and Gawain catch Mr Gaiter dressed as the Hogfather and their belief in the Hogfather vanishes.  Teatime tells Mr Brown to find the Tooth Fairy's secret room.  Susan finds [[Bilious]] in the Hogfather's castle and carries him out as the castle collapses.  Mr Brown opens a door and they find [[Toothguard 7]] hiding and Toothguard 7 tells them he won't tell them anything and Teatime kills him.  Death finds the body of Toothguard 7 and Toothguard 7 tells Death about Teatime taking the teeth.  Susan brings Bilious to the Tower of Art of the Unseen University for Wizards and asks Ridcully for help.  Death goes to the home of of a young boy and reads off his list which includes a puppy named Scruff.  Albert tells Death that the boy can't get everything on his list, because he is poor and so must get cheaper things not on his list.  Albert then tells Death about when he was young and wanted a model horse from a toy store, but never got it.  Death decides to change things while he is on the job and gives the boy everything he wanted.  The Lecturer in Recent Runes tells Susan he can cast a spell that can take away Bilious' hangover and separate it into a vial, but might kill him.  The Dean suggests they just mix up everything and give it to Bilious.  Bilious tries the concoction and survives.  Ridcully tells the other wizards that he had mentioned a god of hangovers and the Lecturer in Recent Runes says at least he didn't say anything about a [[Hair Loss Fairy]].  They go to Ponder Stibbons to ask Hex for help.  Ridcully asks Hex about what is going on and while they are waiting, a Hair Loss Fairy appears on the head of The Dean. 
 
Susan thinks Ridcully is calling beings into existence and The Bursar mentions he wondered if there was an [[Eater of Socks]].  A drunk [[Student Wizard]] walks into the room wearing a Toothguard helmet and then passes out.  Bilious recalls Pixie Helper mention the end of servitude.  Ridcully asks Hex where the Tooth Fairy's castle is located at.  Susan and Bilious leave on Binky to go to the Tooth Fairy's castle.  In the laundry room, the Eater of Socks eats one of the Chair of Indefinite Studies' socks.  Ridcully asks Hex again what is going on and Stibbons tells him he thinks what they are getting are personification of forces.  Hex says new creatures are appearing due to some beliefs disappearing.  Death and Albert find a match girl dead from hypothermia in an alley, and Death restores her life as a Hogswatch present.  He hands the match girl over to Nobbs and Visit and tells them he will be checking up on her periodically.  Mr Brown is about to unlock the door, when magic causes part of the lock to engage.  The wizards stay up to catch the Hogfather as he delivers presents.  Death shows up and they catch him and notice he has a fake beard and pillow under his robe.  Mr Brown fails to open the lock and Teatime has Banjo grab him and throw him down the stairs, killing Mr Brown. 
 
Susan and Bilious enter the Tooth Fairy's castle through a child's painting.  The Tooth Fairy's castle starts to fight back and starts to attack people with their worst nightmares.  Susan and Bilious find Violet and free her.  Bilious asks Violet if she drinks and after she tells him no, he tells her, nice castle and they both smile at each other.  Death tells the wizards about the Auditors and their plan.  Chickenwire attacks Bilious, but a force pushes him inside a large wardrobe and he dies of fright.  Death asks Hex questions and Hex tells him only regular and consistent belief will save humans.  Death asks Hex if he believes in the Hogfather and Hex takes some time, but says yes and then asks for a present.  Teatime steals Death's sword from Susan and introduces himself to her.  Mr Sideney gets the last door unlocked and Teatime tells him he can leave.  Mr Sideney is attacked by what he thinks is the scissor man and dies of fright.  An argument breaks out when Medium Dave wants to leave and Teatime tells Banjo to grab Susan.  A spectral image of [[Ma Lillywhite]] appears and accuses Banjo of being bad and Medium Dave of letting Banjo get into trouble.  Medium Dave dies of fright and Teatime tries to use Death's sword on Susan, but it doesn't work due to them being in an unnatural location.  Susan knocks Teatime over the edge of a balcony and he falls out of the Tooth Fairy's castle and lands in the banquet hall of the Unseen University. 
 
The door opens in the Tooth Fairy's castle and Susan enters the room.  She sees the Tooth Fairy laying in bed who then transforms into various things to try and scare Susan.  The Tooth Fairy tells Susan that she is the original Bogey Man who after some time decided to protect children instead of frightening them.  The Tooth Fairy tells Susan she is too weak to take care of the teeth and then disappears.  Susan tells Banjo that he should take over the Tooth Fairy's job and he asks for a puppy.  Bilious and Violet run to help Susan and she tells them that Banjo is now in charge of the Tooth Fairy's castle and Susan leaves.  She returns to the Gaiter residence and Death tells her it isn't over yet and takes her back towards the Hogfather's castle.  They see a boar being chased by the Auditors shaped as dogs.  Susan jumps onto the boar that will become the Hogfather and they cross an icy bridge which collapses after they cross it.  Death appears behind the Auditor dogs and kills them.  The sun comes up and the boar transforms into the Hogfather, who takes back his job from Death.  Death drops Susan off and they go inside the Gaiter residence for some coco.  Teatime grabs Susan as she is heating the water and threatens to kill Susan with Death's sword.  Teatime has Twyla and Gawain come into the room and they tell Teatime that he is the creepy monster.  Teatime goes to kill Death and Susan throws a poker at Death, which goes through him and impales Teatime.  Teatime cries and dies and Death collects his soul.  Death gives Susan a Hogswatch card and she tells him Happy Hogswatch.  Banjo gets a puppy and plays with it.
 
In the past, Death goes to the toy store and buys the model horse from [[The Toymaker]].

Latest revision as of 21:00, 26 January 2021

Death must save Christmas as an assassin breaks into the Tooth Fairy's castle in order to kill the Hogfather.


Genre

Christmas

Fantasy, Comedy

Characters/Groups

Albert - David Jason

Teatime - Marc Warren

Susan - Michelle Dockery

Lord Downey - David Warner

Vernon Crumley - Tony Robinson

Mr Sideney - Nigel Planer

Medium Dave - Peter Guinness

Banjo - Stephen Marcus

Chickenwire - Craig Conway

Bilious - Rhodri Meilir

Violet - Sinead Matthews

The Voice of Death - Ian Richardson

The Voice of the Raven - Neil Pearson

Corporal Nobbs - Nicholas Tennant

Constable Visit - Richard Katz

Ponder Stibbons - Ed Coleman

Mr Brown - Geoffrey Hutchins

The Dean - John Franklyn-Robbins

The Bursar - Roger Frost

Lecturer in Recent Runes - Timothy Bateson

Chair of Indefinite Studies - John Boswall

Death - Marnix Van Den Broeke

Ernie - Arthur White

Mr Gaiter - Robert Portal

Mrs Gaiter - Deborah Winckles

Twyla - Madeleine Rackic Platt

Gawain - Hugo Altman

Tooth Fairy/Bogey Man - Bridget Turner

Pixie Helper - Gregor Henderson-Begg

Modo - Trevor Jones

Student Wizard - James Mellor

Bobble Hat Child - Martha Katz

Bobble Hat Child's Mother - Rachel Edwards

Grotto Hogfather - Dominic Borelli

Guest 1 - Jon Ridgeon

Hogfather - Shend

Young Albert - Fox Jackson-Keen

Slimazel the Bogeyman - Don Wetherhead

Carter - John Cartier

Toothguard 1 - Johnny Warman

Toothguard 7 - Tim Plester

Auditor 1 - Peter Holdway

Auditor 2 - Andre Lamotte

Auditor 3 - Adam Marvel

Auditor 4 - Andrew Swain

Additional Voices - Andy Robb

Verruca Gnome/Hair Loss Fairy - Danny Da Costa

Ma Lillywhite - Maggie McCarthy

Small Boy - Aaron Barker

Small Boy's Sister - Lydia Altman

Death of Rats - Dorckey Hellmice

The Toymaker - Terry Pratchett

Mustrum Ridcully - Joss Ackland

Great A'Tuin

Eater of Socks

Hex

Binky

Character thumbnails with links to profiles

Detailed Synopsis

"Everything starts somewhere, although many physicists disagree. There is the constant desire to find out where. Where is the point where it all began? But much, much later than that, the Discworld was formed. Drifting onwards through space atop four elephants on the shell of a giant turtle, the great A'Tuin. It was some time after its creation when most people forgot that the very oldest stories of the beginning are, sooner or later, about blood. At least, that's one theory. The philosopher Didactylos has suggested an alternative hypothesis. Things just happen, what the hell? And so our story begins in Ankh-Morpork, the twin city of proud Ankh and pestilent Morpork, the biggest city in Discworld, a city where magic is just another job, and where the Tower of Art of the Unseen University for Wizards looms over all the dark, narrow streets. Our story begins on a midwinter festival bearing a remarkable similarity to your Christmas. And so, it was the night before Hogswatch."

Susan tells Twyla and Gawain a bedtime story about Jack and the Beanstock, but in the perspective that Jack is the bad guy. Twyla asks Susan if the Hogfather is coming and Gawain asks when he will arrive. Susan tells them if they don't believe in the Hogfather, then he won't come. At the Guild of Assassins, Lord Downey gets a visit from one of the Auditors. He offers Lord Downey three million dollars in order for the Guild to destroy the Hogfather. Meanwhile, the Hogfather is making his rounds delivering toys. Susan gets a knock on her window, but tells whoever it is to go away and shortly after, Twyla walks in and tells her she is afraid of the monster in the cellar. Guest 1 sees Susan carrying a fire poker and tells Mrs Gaiter, Mr Gaiter and the party guests. Mrs Gaiter asks Susan what she is doing, and Susan explains she is going to use it to kill the monster. Carter brings in tea for Lord Downey and goes to fetch another cup for Teatime, who has suddenly appeared in the room. Lord Downey goes over Teatime's assassination of Sir George and shows him a drawing of the Hogfather. The Gaiters and party guests listen as Susan gets rid of the monster and as she leaves the cellar, Mr Gaiter claps for her and congratulates her. After the guests leave, Susan drags a bag with the monster and kicks it outside. Teatime tells Lord Downey the task of killing the Hogfather will be difficult, but he has already thought about how to kill the Hogfather and Death and takes the job.

Death notices something is amiss and takes his sword and scythe. Teatime has a meeting with Medium Dave, Banjo, Chickenwire and Mr Sideney. Twyla tells Susan there is a monster under her bed and Susan finds Slimazel the Bogeyman hiding under Twyla's bed. Susan warns Slimazel to go away and he flees. Mr Brown shows up at the meeting and Teatime punches Banjo in the mouth, knocking out one of his teeth. As Violet collects Banjo's tooth she is grabbed, while Teatime hijacks Ernie's carriage. Banjo carries Violet and puts her in Ernie's carriage and the others get inside. Banjo reminds Medium Dave that their mom told them not to hit girls. Teatime then tells Ernie to drive to the Unseen University. Ponder Stibbons tells The Bursar that they no longer have a radiation shield as Hex advised it was needed. Ponder then shows The Bursar a thaumic particle accelerator the students built. The Bursar runs to The Dean and asks him if he has seen the Head of Inadvisably Applied Magic. The Chair of Indefinite Studies suggests he ask the Lecturer in Recent Runes and an explosion erupts. Mustrum Ridcully walks into the room and says in his day as a student he wouldn't be studying the night before Hogswatch. He tells tells The Bursar and the others that he is going to reopen former Archchancellor Weatherwax's old bathroom.

Ernie drives the carriage to a wall behind the Unseen University and Teatime takes some magic powder that Ernie has and throws it at the wall and a portal forms. Teatime then kills Ernie and drives the carriage through the portal. The Auditors appear and one of them figures out that Teatime is going after the Tooth Fairy in order to control the minds of children. Death comes to collect Ernie and then asks him about Teatime. Teatime and the others walk into the Tooth Fairy's castle and some Toothguards stick their heads out from behind pillars and look at them. The Toothguards are then killed by Medium Dave and Chickenwire. Toothguard 1 is talking to another Toothguard when they are killed by Banjo. Another Toothguard is killed by Teatime. Albert is told by Death that something isn't right. The Raven agrees with Death and the mythological person's room opens up and Death notices the Hogfather's sand grains are running out. Modo gets the machine ready for Ridcully to take a shower, and The Bursar and others warn Ridcully against using the shower, but Ridcully gets into the shower. Teatime tells Chickenwire and Medium Dave to pile all the teeth into a pile and tells Mr Brown to unlock every door in the castle.

Death rides Binky to the Hogfather's Castle of Bones. He finds the Hogfather's robes but no Hogfather. Pixie Helper runs down the castle stairs and is visibly drunk and celebrates that he has Hogswatch off, but realizes he will have a bad hangover in the morning. The Pixie Helper sees Death and then runs away. Twyla and Gawain start to question if the Hogfather is real to Susan. A rat is killed in a rat trap and Death of Rats comes to collect its soul. Death disguised as the Hogfather comes down the chimney and leaves presents for a girl named Virginia. Ridcully turns a tap called Old Faithful and then quickly exits the shower due to the extreme water pressure. Susan catches Raven in the house and she kicks him out after he warns her, but doesn't tell her what the warning is. Teatime asks Mr Sideney if he has any friends and then tells him, he doesn't have many friends, but also doesn't have any enemies. Susan catches Death dressed as the Hogfather and he tells her the Hogfather is gone. Susan demands to know what is going on, but Death refuses to tell her. Mr Brown opens a door and Teatime finds a Toothguard hiding and scares him to death. Susan stops time and leaves the house and finds Binky outside and rides him.

Ridcully tells The Dean a story his father told him about the Verruca Gnome. Susan goes to Death's house and the Raven welcomes her home. Albert suggests that they do a public appearance in order to increase children's belief in the Hogfather. At Crumley's department store, an explosion occurs and Small Boy and Small Boy's Sister comment on the Hogfather's hogs and how one of them is peeing. Grotto Hogfather walks out of the Hogfather display and tells Vernon Crumley he quits. Crumley confronts Death and demands to know what is going on. While Ridcully is trimming his toe nails, he catches the Verruca Gnome sneaking up on him. Death asks Bobble Hat Child what she wants for Hogswatch and when Bobble Hat Child's Mother starts to speak for her, Death snaps her fingers, causing Bobble Hat Child's Mother to stop talking. Bobble Hat Child asks for an army and castle and a sword. The Verruca Gnome tells Ridcully he doesn't know why he is the Verruca gnome, he just suddenly came to be and Ridcully shows him the special nail clipping disposal in the bathroom and tells him that if you have a part of someone, you can control them.

Medium Dave and Chickenwire finish gathering all of the teeth and Mr Sideney starts to cast his spell. Bobble Hat Child's Mother tells Death she can't afford everything he just gave Bobble Hat Child and Death tells her they are free, which upsets Crumley. Ridcully talks with Stibbons who shows him Hex. Ridcully then shows him and The Bursar the Verruca Gnome and wonders why there isn't a god of hangovers. Raven tells Susan that the Hogfather didn't always hand out presents and he was once a demiurge that people sacrificed to in order for the sun to rise. He then had to change when people realizes the sun rose anyways. Corporal Nobbs and Constable Visit go to Crumley's and Crumley demands they arrest Death. Nobbs waits in line and tells Death he was a good individual. As teeth start to fly out of the teeth pile, Mr Sideney tells Teatime there are random bits of belief affecting the spell. Nobbs shows Visit his Burleigh & Stronghearm double-action triple-cantilever crossbow with a polished-walnut stock and silver engraved facings he got from Death and Visit disapproves. Susan figures out that for the sun to come up tomorrow, the Hogfather has to be alive. The magic on the tooth works and the Hogfather's castle starts to crumble. As Medium Dave and Chickenwire are planning to leave with property deeds they found, Teatime stops them and tells Medium Dave, he controls Banjo now.

Susan takes Death's sword and Binky and goes to the Hogfather's castle. Twyla and Gawain catch Mr Gaiter dressed as the Hogfather and their belief in the Hogfather vanishes. Teatime tells Mr Brown to find the Tooth Fairy's secret room. Susan finds Bilious in the Hogfather's castle and carries him out as the castle collapses. Mr Brown opens a door and they find Toothguard 7 hiding and Toothguard 7 tells them he won't tell them anything and Teatime kills him. Death finds the body of Toothguard 7 and Toothguard 7 tells Death about Teatime taking the teeth. Susan brings Bilious to the Tower of Art of the Unseen University for Wizards and asks Ridcully for help. Death goes to the home of of a young boy and reads off his list which includes a puppy named Scruff. Albert tells Death that the boy can't get everything on his list, because he is poor and so must get cheaper things not on his list. Albert then tells Death about when he was young and wanted a model horse from a toy store, but never got it. Death decides to change things while he is on the job and gives the boy everything he wanted. The Lecturer in Recent Runes tells Susan he can cast a spell that can take away Bilious' hangover and separate it into a vial, but might kill him. The Dean suggests they just mix up everything and give it to Bilious. Bilious tries the concoction and survives. Ridcully tells the other wizards that he had mentioned a god of hangovers and the Lecturer in Recent Runes says at least he didn't say anything about a Hair Loss Fairy. They go to Ponder Stibbons to ask Hex for help. Ridcully asks Hex about what is going on and while they are waiting, a Hair Loss Fairy appears on the head of The Dean.

Susan thinks Ridcully is calling beings into existence and The Bursar mentions he wondered if there was an Eater of Socks. A drunk Student Wizard walks into the room wearing a Toothguard helmet and then passes out. Bilious recalls Pixie Helper mention the end of servitude. Ridcully asks Hex where the Tooth Fairy's castle is located at. Susan and Bilious leave on Binky to go to the Tooth Fairy's castle. In the laundry room, the Eater of Socks eats one of the Chair of Indefinite Studies' socks. Ridcully asks Hex again what is going on and Stibbons tells him he thinks what they are getting are personification of forces. Hex says new creatures are appearing due to some beliefs disappearing. Death and Albert find a match girl dead from hypothermia in an alley, and Death restores her life as a Hogswatch present. He hands the match girl over to Nobbs and Visit and tells them he will be checking up on her periodically. Mr Brown is about to unlock the door, when magic causes part of the lock to engage. The wizards stay up to catch the Hogfather as he delivers presents. Death shows up and they catch him and notice he has a fake beard and pillow under his robe. Mr Brown fails to open the lock and Teatime has Banjo grab him and throw him down the stairs, killing Mr Brown.

Susan and Bilious enter the Tooth Fairy's castle through a child's painting. The Tooth Fairy's castle starts to fight back and starts to attack people with their worst nightmares. Susan and Bilious find Violet and free her. Bilious asks Violet if she drinks and after she tells him no, he tells her, nice castle and they both smile at each other. Death tells the wizards about the Auditors and their plan. Chickenwire attacks Bilious, but a force pushes him inside a large wardrobe and he dies of fright. Death asks Hex questions and Hex tells him only regular and consistent belief will save humans. Death asks Hex if he believes in the Hogfather and Hex takes some time, but says yes and then asks for a present. Teatime steals Death's sword from Susan and introduces himself to her. Mr Sideney gets the last door unlocked and Teatime tells him he can leave. Mr Sideney is attacked by what he thinks is the scissor man and dies of fright. An argument breaks out when Medium Dave wants to leave and Teatime tells Banjo to grab Susan. A spectral image of Ma Lillywhite appears and accuses Banjo of being bad and Medium Dave of letting Banjo get into trouble. Medium Dave dies of fright and Teatime tries to use Death's sword on Susan, but it doesn't work due to them being in an unnatural location. Susan knocks Teatime over the edge of a balcony and he falls out of the Tooth Fairy's castle and lands in the banquet hall of the Unseen University.

The door opens in the Tooth Fairy's castle and Susan enters the room. She sees the Tooth Fairy laying in bed who then transforms into various things to try and scare Susan. The Tooth Fairy tells Susan that she is the original Bogey Man who after some time decided to protect children instead of frightening them. The Tooth Fairy tells Susan she is too weak to take care of the teeth and then disappears. Susan tells Banjo that he should take over the Tooth Fairy's job and he asks for a puppy. Bilious and Violet run to help Susan and she tells them that Banjo is now in charge of the Tooth Fairy's castle and Susan leaves. She returns to the Gaiter residence and Death tells her it isn't over yet and takes her back towards the Hogfather's castle. They see a boar being chased by the Auditors shaped as dogs. Susan jumps onto the boar that will become the Hogfather and they cross an icy bridge which collapses after they cross it. Death appears behind the Auditor dogs and kills them. The sun comes up and the boar transforms into the Hogfather, who takes back his job from Death. Death drops Susan off and they go inside the Gaiter residence for some coco. Teatime grabs Susan as she is heating the water and threatens to kill Susan with Death's sword. Teatime has Twyla and Gawain come into the room and they tell Teatime that he is the creepy monster. Teatime goes to kill Death and Susan throws a poker at Death, which goes through him and impales Teatime. Teatime cries and dies and Death collects his soul. Death gives Susan a Hogswatch card and she tells him Happy Hogswatch. Banjo gets a puppy and plays with it.

In the past, Death goes to the toy store and buys the model horse from The Toymaker.